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Students Outraged after Attending Red Sox Final Game

Another story from our trusted and professional Shallot correspondents!
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On September 29th of 2024 six Lake Region students went down to Fenway in Boston to catch the final game of the Red Sox season. They had already been mathematically eliminated from the postseason chase and were playing the Tampa Bay Rays in a game that meant essentially nothing, but these six students had a plan.

They were going to all streak across the field in such a fashion at the same time so that they would be guaranteed not only to be on live television but so that when they got home from the game they could watch themselves on Sox in Two.

This show is the most popular NESN show that airs throughout the year between the time of midnight and two in the morning. The plan was for all of them to streak at the same time from many different angles while being completely covered in blue paint, and one of them even got into the radio booth to say hi to Joe Castiglione in his last game broadcasting the Sox after 42 years.

Although LR junior Bob Newman, who was the one that got to go into the booth, was heard on the live radio broadcast, none of the other students made an appearance on Sox in Two and were all tackled by security. resulting in three sprained hands, and one torn ACL. When reached for comment, Bob said he wished that he could have at the very least gotten Joe’s signature for a souvenir, and said that although he and the rest of the guys have been banned for life from the stadium, he plans on going back next year and taking some dirt from the mound as a souvenir.

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