George Santos is the only candidate that the Shallot can get behind. We have a commitment to chaos and also the truth which is what he will bring. Also as the sole Jew-ish candidate we feel the need to back him. He showed a very good record in congress despite the witch hunt that tried to discredit him. He is young and his ability to procure large amounts of money nearly effortlessly could fix the national deficit The fact that he represents a hardworking neighborhood in the Big Apple which is essentially the same as the NEK where the Shallot is located is a very good thing. All other options on the ballot wouldn’t be good for the future of the Shallot business model, as they are totally predictable. As a staff, the LR post urges you to abandon the mainstream choices and choose Santos, a man who embraces the truth and money, just like the Shallot, the most popular news source outside of the Onion.
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The Shallot Endorses George Santos
This is a presidential campaign we can get behind.
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About the Contributor
Max Demaine, Shallot Editor
Max Demaine is a Ranger Post writer and the Editor of the Shallot. He joined the program his sophomore year and hopes to continue writing for the post, and its sister paper the Shallot. Max likes to play many sports in his free time including soccer, baseball, skiing, cross country and wrestling. Max also plays the french horn in the high school band here at LR.